So, its been a while since I learnt about the term “brelfie” that is to say – breastfeeding selfie. I’ll confess, I take a fair few selfies, I love a good selfie and I’m an unashamed owner of a selfie stick because, dammit, it makes my life easier when I’m out and about trying to get snaps of me and the kids. That being said I never used to be a fan of taking pictures while I was breastfeeding. It just felt like something that was private, however recently, I’m all up in that brelfie life.
I’ve been taking pictures throughout my breastfeeding experiences with Edith, mainly after it became habit as if I ever wanted to send a snapchat it would be with the baby attached to my boob in some fashion or other as she never seemed to be off! Now its just become natural to take a picture and not even think about it. I must say when I look back at them, and I look at some of the breastfeeding pictures I have on instagram, there is something very empowering about it – almost a “I am woman, hear me roar” kind of moment. I feel very lucky to be able to feed Edie and very proud of my ability (and her ability) to do so, especially whilst growing and maintaining this business. It’s something that I look at and feel I can say, actually, I’m pretty impressive – in this one I’m writing and working, in this one I’m cooking tea and in this one I’m plain knackered but didn’t end up killing anyone that day so what a freakin achievement.
I’m very lucky in the fact that I’ve never had any stick for sharing “brelfies” – the worst comment I received was a recent one of “I don’t think I’d feed a child over a year, but that’s just me” and there is no way that is offensive, just a matter of opinion, which is fine – if you put it out there you have to accept people will share their thoughts with you. I do know a lot of people receive a mass of negativity about breastfeeding pictures with everything from “that isn’t something I want to see” to ” Urgh, gross, put that shit away”. What I don’t get is why?
I know that breastfeeding is the most natural thing in the world – it really is – so why does it offend some people to see a picture of a woman doing it? I mean, obviously as a blogger I share my life through images and words online, but even for people wanting to put breastfeeding pictures on their personal Facebook profiles or just to keep for themselves, what is wrong with wanting to remember that special moment? I often think it is something that is super relatable as well for women that have been breastfeeding and helpful to know that others are struggling or finding it hard. I shared a picture of me feeding Edith whilst trying to work in my home office and it received a tonne of love from other mamas who are either working from home or could just relate to the picture because they weren’t able to get stuff done as baby wanted constant feeding. That doesn’t even have to be breastfeeding, does it? We can all relate to that – baby wanting to be held, cuddled and not letting you get on with the things you need to do.
So, would you take a brelfie?
You know I’m all about a brelfie, I’ve just written a blog post about how important they are actually. It’s such a good way to help normalise breastfeeding.
Personally, I would not take a breastfeeding selfie unless it was going to be kept private. I think it’s great that women breastfeed and everything, but it’s just such a personal moment between mother and child. I asked my 19 year old son his thoughts, and he is SO GLAD I never took breastfeeding selfies to share with the Universe. He said he would have “been totally mortified” if I did that. I think these mothers are wanting approval. SO BAD that they need to put it all out there without considering how it would affect their child. My son would have had issues with me over it. It’s not necessary to show the whole world such a beautiful private moment. It’s nice to keep some things sacred. He even thanked me for not doing that, as it would have made him feel very uncomfortable. Think about the kids, people!!!
I love a good brelfie
Lovely pictures. Bf should be the biggest non issue going. Babies need to be fed. And I don’t care how ! I didn’t bf – I tried , we couldn’t and it made me miserable as sin. I don’t know if I’d do it again either.
As it goes I wouldn’t share a brelfie or any other selfie of me and my kid as in nearly 2 years now there isn’t a single picture of her online anywhere…we don’t want them up. But if I did I wouldn’t mind sharing brelfies. I’m sure. I have no issue with anyone sharing 🙂
I never breastfed and never intended to either.
We are in a more open world now so I think brelfies to me are ok.
And for me I think it’s great that you have the opportunity to choose Janine, I never want anyone to think they have to if it’s not for them 🙂 H x
I absolutely love brelfies and would take more myself except I am rubbish at selfies as it is haha x
Haha – I do love a good selfie Sian – the ones I’ve seen you take are beauts! H x
I have no problem with it at all, it is really up to you and if your happy then great! Lovely to see someone who isn’t bothered by it.
Thanks Stephanie 🙂 H x
I personally wouldn’t, but then I’m one of those rare people who don’t take loads of selfies! I just don’t see the need to show everyone photos of you feeding your baby. They don’t offend me at all, it’s just something I think of as unnecessary – you’re feeding your baby, so are millions of other people, it’s just a normal thing to do not particularly photo-worthy. Each to their own though!
Thanks for your thoughts Sarah – I think it’s more to try and show other women that there is nothing wrong with breastfeeding and it isn’t something to shy away from. A bit of social influence kind of malarky if you see what I mean! To each their own though as you say 🙂 H x
I must say I love brelfies, whether posted on social media or kept all to myself. They are some of my most intimate and cherished moments with Henry and I know the days spent nursing are numbered and I want to remember them forever. I simply cannot imagine why someone would ever see a breastfeeding mom as anything but beautiful.
Love your positive take on this
Thanks Johanna 🙂 It’s something I see in a very positive light H x
I’ve got no issues with breastfeeding pics. There’s really no shame in it and something that shouldn’t be hidden.
I agree Jemma 🙂 H x
At the end of the day it is completely your choice. I wish I had just to show to myself that I actually did it x
Oh bless you Viki – I wish I had with Toby, it’s something you can’t go back to isn’t it?! H x
I am going to be breastfeeding my third baby who is due in July (hopefully) and although I don’t think there is anything wrong in these kind of photos, I don’t know if I could put them up on my social media only because I know some people on there will say something bad or judge. hopefully one day I will have the courage too
Thanks Beth, I hope you do – or if you don’t want to, you get some just for you 🙂
Best of luck with your feeding journey lovely H x
Love it Harriet! Why should anyone feel ashamed about breast feeding? I am so happy to see young mothers embracing it 🙂 x
Thanks Zoe! 🙂 H x